x_snowvalley | (no subject)

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Well, it is my job to inform you that Doug, Marie-Ange, and Amanda have not checked in at their appointed time, and are officially missing. You know, within the letter of the law - because really, who is to say that Doug has not simply lost track of time pretending to be an elf on the internet, and the others are waiting for him to finish with that - but it is, actually, literally my job. So there you are. Informed. I'm going back to the filing, and writing a letter detailing why I should not be put on the Sunday night shift ever again.

By the way: Whoever thinks that 'G' comes before 'C' in the alphabet is in for a cruel awakening someday. I only hope I am there to witness it.

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I'll call Shiro, you get to tell Wanda. (Isn't that fun? You get to tell the person who can reach you when they start swearing. I know, don't thank me. It's merely my gift to you, as your friend.)

Fortunately, Ms Maximoff is very, very old, so we can view her gutter mouth simply as eccentricity brought on by dementia. I enjoy our conversations, really.

I would like to make note here that the oldsters can see this journal thread, and that I for one welcome our slightly decrepit overlords.

Right, having got that out of the way. WTH? How does anyone get lost in Norway? It's Norway!

Oh, they serve their purpose; all organizations need that veneer of respectability that only Remy can bring us, am I right? Oh, wait.

I don't know how they got lost in Norway. Where is Norway, anyway? I always thought it was somewhere near Africa.

Nah, it's much colder then Africa. It's like...this little mini place somewhere. (I have no idea where Norway is. This is weird. Shiro by the way is _so_ cranky. Anyone would think he'd had a hard life or something.) That boy needs to have sex more.

I looked it up on a map. It is somewhere near Sweden, or Denmark, or something like that.

Shiro is a whiner. He has always been a whiner and should probably just be put down, but unfortunately I am not in charge of these things. Otherwise the world would be a much better (and emptier) place.

I know Denmark! It's where Shakespeare killed a lot of people. Totally supposed to be all grey and dreary. How anyone lives there, I have no idea.

If you killed everyone, who would there be to get you coffee in the morning? We must think of these things, you see.

Oh, yeah, I had to read that for English last year. Only I just read the Cliff's Notes. And then the teacher got mad at me for writing, "In Cliff's Notes, it says that the main character is Hamlet," on the test. At least I was honest.

I wouldn't kill everyone. Just extraneous people.

Someone remind me again why we hired these two?

I'm going to find one of those "put the countries on the map" flash games, and make you both play it until your grasp of geography extends further than "was in the same room as an atlas, once".

I would like to think that when Remy checks in to let us know what he's achieved for our intel nets, you don't simply file it all under "one of the men with the funny accents talked to some other people ( probably with funny accents) in a place that is a long way away", and in fact, started having some kind of picture of how our networks are located, and how they inter-relate.

If I start calling you Uncle Pete will you hang me out the window again? As in, That's why we have you, Uncle Pete. To show us the error of our ways and learn us some good geography. I know where the important places are, just not snorway.

The mood I am in at the moment, I will arrange for you to go somewhere and get shot if you call me Uncle Pete.

As for relative importance of places: here is an interesting fact about "Snorway" - in the late eighties and early nineties, Norway had some of the highest bandwidth availability in Europe. Universities and other establishments had multi-megabit broadband when other places in Europe were still using 2400 baud modems for entire businesses. In internet terms, Norway is still one of the best connected countries on the planet, with a technical infrastructure that is substantially better than most other countries in its economic weight class.

I have provided this fact for you as an important learning exercise. What I would like you to do is go away and find out why the fuck *I* would know or care about that kind of crap, and by extension, why you should too.

I am intrigued and would like to subscribe to your newsletter. In other words, I'm on it boss.

You were joking about the getting shot, right? Because, you know, these are very expensive clothes I'm wearing. Bullet holes would spoil my entire look.

Son of a bitch - the reason that they haven't checked is in because they managed to get captured by the cultists they were researching/looking for. Doug managed to get a message over to me on my phone.

After doing research, I think we going to need some bigger backup.

You assume, Miss Rasputin, that my mouth in any form wasn't started at a very young age. The thing with being insane is that it gives me a wonderful excuse to do a great many things.

I have a feeling you've already got an idea of who to invite.

And having gone and researched like the good little girl I am...I come to the conclusion that NATO appears to like throwing around bags of cash in Norway.

So, did the Russians ever realise that it was used as an escape route/staging point?

They also gave us a-ha.

Oh, they would. I guess it's a good thing Jubilee bullied me about the flight.

Well, at least you admit that your mind is gone. Most old people I tell this to do not react very well.

Is this one of those things you're going to mock me for not knowing about? By the way, Cain stole all my chicken. I am pouting as we speak.

WTF how do you not know Take On Me (http://youtube.com/watch?v=dIzUD7FKcBk)?!

I'm not entirely sure, but I've obviously missed something. That's a really hot looking guy, 80's fashion and all. Pity they're probably old and decrepit by now.

Okay...I'll take bizarre 80's bands for $100.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXPUkrz7Uow

What the hell is up with the random flags?

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